COLUMN : anti anti-aging

i’m not a fan of using the word aging to describe damage to the skin or body.
why ?
because that implies that growing older automatically means that we’re getting damaged. less good. more used up. no longer whole and healthy.

the only two things we know for certain in life is that first we age, then we die. the rest – well that’s more flexible. but neither aging nor dying is optional. so why are we fighting it ? we can try to prolong life by leading a healthy life. and we can try to age with less damage caused by taking care of ourselves. so that the life we do have is as long and happy as possible.

but aging in itself is not something i want to try to avoid. firstly because it’s impossible – so it’s inevitable that i would fail. secondly, and more importantly, because aging should be considered something beautiful. we evolve, get wiser, more experienced, get to know ourselves better. that this shows in the way we look is something we should celebrate, not see as failure. i want to age beautifully, without getting worn down by a damaging lifestyle, but by getting more complexity and character in the way i look. i want to see lines of laughter, hardness of muscles, softness of leftover skin. getting uniquely weathered by a life well lived.

i often get told that i look younger than my 30 years. that i don’t look a day over 25, 19, 22. this is meant as a compliment. but it’s not really received as one. those years were all fine years. but i don’t want to look less experienced than i am. i want to look like me – a healthy 30 year old. that’s my point, no matter which age i happen to be at, i want to be pleased.

i find it sexy. seeing signs of aging in someone who has visibly left childhood behind and entered adulthood, with no less joie de vivre. with the self-confidence and appreciation experience can give. i’ve never felt more beautiful than i do now, and i suspect i’m only going to feel hotter at 40. at least i hope i will.
is this strange ? perhaps. but i consider it way better than the alternative : feeling my most beautiful at 16, and after that only seeing defeat when i look in the mirror.

i have decided to not listen when they tell me to anti-age. when they say that my lines and loose skin and un-perky breasts are flaws to fix. defects to perfect. i am in no mood to stay a young girl my whole life. it was fun, but that time has passed. womanhood, i look forward to you.

love // jenny